Millennials are on their way to changing the world. They are the largest workforce ever, they’re more connected than any previous generation, they roll out apps by the dozen—oh, and they screwed up dating big time. That’s right, millennials, you’ve ruined it for the rest of us. Here are some main reasons why, thanks to you, dating in 2017 truly sucks.
1. The Age of App’aggedon
Online dating sites like OkCupid or Match.com should sound familiar to you by now. But did you notice the dating app deluge too? There’s Tinder, Bumble, Happn, Feeld, Badoo, Coffee Meets Bagel, Coy, Blume, Huggle, League, Grindr and many, many more. By the time you finish reading this article, there’ll probably be a couple new ones on the market, too. Ready to dive in? Not so fast! Do your research first. You have to figure out what kind of relationship you want, find the right app, download it, start the authentication process and complete your profile.
Sound time consuming? It is. That’s why we think that onlinedating.sucks.
2. The Catfishing Epidemic
Authentication process you say? Why, yes. According to a recent survey, about 10% of dating profiles are fake. In light of this catfishing epidemic several apps have now added features making it difficult for imitators to sign up. While this will effectively reduce the number of bogus profiles, it still doesn’t guarantee you any virtual honesty. We all tend to embellish the truth now and then, a phenomenon that only increases when it comes to virtual profiles.
Catfishing.sucks, but did you really think you were meeting that 5″9 buxom blonde with a PhD for coffee later?
3. The Ghosting Phenomenon
Which brings us to ghosting, or the art of dropping off the face of planet earth. It’s a given that many online acquaintances will never develop into romantic relationships. But millennials have comfortably embraced the habit of ignoring someone until they go away. Not cool, guys. After all, you wouldn’t just walk away mid-conversation from someone you’ve been talking to on the street.
4. The New Vocabulary
You’re now familiar with the terms catfish and ghosting. But wait, there’s more! Millennials have not only created a new dating culture, they’ve also coined new cryptic dating jargon. “Dating” is out, instead use “talking” or “hanging out”. Not sure about someone? Then you “benchmark” them or store them as a “layaway”, enabling you to keep your options open. Feelings, in general, should be avoided. Instead, master your use of emojis. The ambiguity of dating lingo can be downright confusing to dating app newbies, who couldn’t possibly know the various implications of the eggplant emoji.
Ugh, we hear ya… ambiguity.sucks.
5. The Great (Red and Blue) Divide
The recent presidential election divided the country and lots of people (read: anyone with a soul) are still deeply emotional about it. And while politics isn’t likely to be on the table when millennials begin “talking”, they’re bound to come up at some point. A blooming relationship will either thrive or be doomed from then on in. Love Trumps Hate, but can Love Trump Trump when your date is in support of that cheeto-dusted monster? We don’t think so.
Trump.sucks, and you should be sure to swipe left on the alt-right.
6. The Inescapable Limbo
Sociologists are worried about millennials. It seems this generation is struggling to define adulthood. It’s not only their career choices, living arrangements or casual relationships that are being criticized. Millennials seem to be stuck in perpetual limbo. They have mastered the art of social representation online, yet they don’t live up to that carefully curated profile in real life. The thing is that love et al. is about as real as it gets. No virtual encounter can replace an offline relationship.
The dating landscape looks pretty grim these days. New technologies, politics and the media have effectively turned the dating scene into a bleak playground for millennials. It’s true that relationships are hard work, break-ups hurt and love sucks at times. But will the collective frustration around dating apps and ambiguous communication eventually yield a new, better dating experience? We’re not holding our breath.
If you’ve had enough of catfishing, ghosting and indecisive hook-ups, share your voice with others on a platform life dating.sucks, mylovelife.sucks, meetingpeople.sucks, ghosting.sucks, myexboyfriendsucks.
Whatever your reasons for wanting to throw in the dating towel, .SUCKS has a place for you. Tell us what .SUCKS about dating today.